Pick Up Lines

DO YOU HAVE A QUARTER DAMN, I WAS GONNA CALL MY MOM AND TELL HER I MET THE GIRL OF MY DREAMS.
KISS ME IF IM WRONG, BUT IS YOUR NAME IS…..
DO YOU HAVE A BAND AID CAUSE I JUST SCRAPPED MY KNEE WHEN I FELL FOR YOU.
DID IT HURT WHEN YOU FELL FROM HEAVEN.
CAN I SEARCH YOUR POCKETS CAUSE STOLE MY HEART.
YOU LOOK TIRED. CAUSE YOU HAVE BEEN RUNNING THROUGH MY MIND ALL NIGHT.
HOW MUCH DOES A POLAR BEAR WHEY ENOUGH TO BREAK THE ICE, MY NAME IS …
WHAT HAS 164 TEETH AND HOLDS BACK THE INCREDIBLE HULK MY ZIPPER.
YOU MUST WORK AT SUBWAY CAUSE YOUR GIVING ME A FOOTLONG.
NICE LEGS.. WHAT TIME DO THEY OPEN
DID YOU FART CAUSE YOU BLEW ME AWAY!!!
A song from your lips is an aria from heaven.
All this could be yours for one low, low price!
Apart from being sexy, what do you do for a living
Are you a parking ticket (What) You got fine written all over you.
Are you a tamale Cause youre hot.
As shes leaving….Hey arent you forgetting something She: What Me!
Ask a woman for the time. “10:30 So today is January 10,1999, at 10:30 PM, thanks I just wanted to be able to remember the exact moment that I met you.”
Baby did you fart, cause you blow me away!
Baby, if you were words on a page, youd be what they call fine print
Baby, somebody better call God, cuz hes missing an angel!
Baby, you must be a broom, cause you just swept me off my feet.
Baby, youre so sweet, you put Hersheys outta business.
Baby, youre the next contestant in the game of love.
Can i get your picture to prove to all my friends that angels really do exist
Champaign can be tickly, and so can I.
(Close hand with nothing inside and give it to her) Its my breath from when you took it away (open palm while saying this).
Damn, if being sexy was a crime, youd be guilty as charged!
Did the sun come out or did you just smile at me
Did you have Campbells soup today (she answers yes/no) Because youre lookin mmm… mmm… good!
Do you have room in your life for another friend
Do you have the time [Gives the time] No, the time to write down my number
Do you know karate Cause your body is really kickin.
Does Levis pay you for wearing those and looking that good
Does my breath smell okay
Does your watch have a second hand I want to know how long it took for me to fall in love with you.
Dont walk into that building — the sprinklers might go off!
Dont you know me from somewhere
Ever since I met you, youve lived in my heart without paying any rent.
Excuse me miss, I dont mean to stare, but um I think youre really Beautiful”
Excuse me miss… Do you have a cigarette Actually, I dont want one, I just wanted to start a conversation with you.
Excuse me miss You dropped something back there (As you look around you ask “where”) Over there! (Ask again: “What did I drop”) He answers back: My jaw!
Excuse me, but did you happen to find my Nobel Peace Prize
Excuse me, I dont want you to think Im ridiculous or anything, but you are the most gorgeous girl/guy I have ever seen. I just felt like I had to tell you.
Excuse me, I just noticed you noticing me and I just wanted to give you notice that I noticed you too.
Excuse me, I think you have something in your eye. Nope, its just a sparkle.
Excuse me, Id like to have kids someday, and I wanted to know how your parents created such a beautiful creature.
Excuse me, Im looking for a friend…do you want to be my friend
Excuse me, is that your perfume that you are wearing
The word of the day is “legs.” Lets go back to my place and spread the word. 287
A cat falls into the water & the rooster laughs. Whats the moral of the story A wet pu*y alwaysmakes a happy cck. 226
Im not Fred Flintstone, but I can make your bedrock! 173
What has 148 teeth and holds back the incredible hulk My Zipper! 298
My magic watch says that you dont have on any underwear. (She says yes I do) Damn! itmust be 15 minutes fast 529
Crap. Something is wrong with my cell phone. {Oh Really. What is that} Itsjust that…your numbers not in it. 152
I dont know much about pies but DAMN you make my banana cream. 115
You may fall from the sky, you may fall from a tree, but the best way to fall… is in love with me. 168
If I received a nickel for everytimeI saw someone as beautiful as you, Id have five cents. 168
I lost my teddy bear, will you sleep with me 271
There are 206 bones in the human body… do you want another one 220
My love for you is like diarrhea, I just canthold it in! 30
My socks are having a party, do your pants want to come down 22
Youre like a prize winning fish. I dontknow whether to eat you or mount you. 67
If a fat man puts you in a bag at night, dont worry I told Santa I wanted you for Christmas. 50
A boy gives a girl 12 roses. 11 fake, 1 real and he says to her ” Iwill stop loving you when all the roses die” 192
Do you work at subway Because you just gave me a footlong! 135
Do you believe in love at first sight, or should I walk by again 75
Do you work for UPS I could have sworn I saw you checking out my package. 47
Do you want to do math Lets add a bed, subtract your clothes, divide your legs and multiply! 91
Screw me if I am wrong, but havent we met before 57
See my friend over there He wants to know if you think Im cute. 81
If I told you that you had a beautiful body, would you hold it against me 22
Do you have a keg in your pants (No!Why) Cause Id like to tap that! 53
If your left leg is Thanksgiving, and your right leg is Christmas, can I visit you between the holidays 66
That shirt is very becoming on you, but if I was on you Id be coming too! 53
Its a good thing that I have my library card. Why Because I am totally checking you out!! 29
Was your Dad a baker Because youve got a nice set of buns. 26
Say “I bet I can kiss you on the lips without touching you.” and kiss her, then tell her you lost the bet. 70
I own a rocket. First stop your moons, then Uranus! 18
You know what would look good on you Me! 19
If I followed you home, would you keep me 27
Are those space pants Because your ass is out of this world! 40
Do you work for Cingular, Cause youre raisenmy bar! 26
I want to tell you your fortune. [Take her hand and write your phone number on it.] Your future is clear. 37
Hey Girl lets play lion tamer…you get down on all fours and Ill stick my head in your mouth! 56
You turn my software into hardware! 46
Lets play carpenter. First we get hammered, thenIll nail you! 16
Do you have a mirror in your pocket Cause I could see myself in your pants. 26
Do I know you Cause you look a lot like my next girlfriend. 25
Are you a parking ticket Because youve got FINE written all over you. 34
Dou sleep on your belly at night If no, can I 19
Are you a pirate Cause I want chobooty. 26
People call me John, but you can call me Tonight! 23
Ive noticed you noticing me and Im just giving you notice that Ive noticed you! 37
Did you have lucky charms for breakfast Because you look magically delicious! 28
Is that a ladder in your pants… or the stairway to heaven 19
Do you know karate Cause your bodys kickin! 18
If I could rearrange the alphabet, Id put U and I together. 28
Can I buy you a drink, or do you just want the money 47
Lets have breakfast together tomorrow; shall I call you or nudge you 22
Your eyes are bluer than the Atlantic ocean, and baby Im lost at sea! 17
You might as well sleep with me because Im going to tell everybody we did it anyway. 40
I may not be the best-looking guy in here, but Im the only one talking to you. 23
Hi, will you help me find my lost puppy I think he went into this cheap motel room across the street. 27
Would you sleep with a stranger [No] Then Hi, my name is… 18
Roses Are Red, Candle Light Flickers, After TheMeal, Its off With The Knickers. 24
Can you take me to the bakery Because, I want a Cutiepielike you! 23
I have a snake and he wants to enter your garden. 26
[man] Excuse me, would you like to dance [women] NO! [man] Maybe u didnt hear me…. I said u look really fat in those pants! 46
If I had a garden Id put your two lips and my two lips together. 34
Did the sun come up or did you just smile at me 30
Can you kiss me on the cheek so I can at least say a cute girl kissed me tonight 55
If you were a new hamburger at McDonalds, you would be a McGorgeous. 43
If you were a burger at McDonalds youd be the McGorgeous. 55
Polar Bear (HUh) I just wanted to break the ice. 12
Excuse me, if I go straight this way, will I be able to reach your heart 16
If you were a booger I would pick you first. 41
I must be in heaven because Im looking at an angel! 15
I must be a snowflake, because Ive fallen for you. 14
Violets are blue, roses are red, whatis it going to take to get you into bed 31
There are 20 angels in the world 11 are playing, 8 are sleeping and 1 of them is standing in front of me. 23
Do your legs hurt from running through my dreams all night 15
Heres $10. Drink until I am really good looking, then come and talk to me. 20
My names [your name]. Thats so you know what to scream in bed. 21
Hi, my names Fred, would you like to test my bed 12
Are you form Tennessee Causeyoure the only ten I see!!! 32
What do you and the weather have in common Youre both Hot! 16
You must be Jamaican, because Jamaican me crazy. 38
If you were a car, Id wax and ride you all over town. 22
Youre ugly, but you intrigue me… 27
Im gay, think you can convert me 32
I would die a million deaths if it meant I could be with you! 16
Could you please step away from the bar Youre melting all the ice! 20
Is your shirt felt (No)Do you want it to be 20
Do you have any raisins No How about a date 31
Can I fish in your pond since all the others seem to be dry or closed 14
Damn boy theres only 2 things I like riding up my ass, my G-String and you! 30
Im the 6,do you want to be the 9 41
Somebody call the cops, because its got to be illegal to look that good! 25
Lets play house, you be the screandoor and iIllbang you all night long. 34
Did it hurt when you fell [Girl: Huh]When you fell from heaven 18
You dont sweat much for a fat chick. 39
Can you lick your nipples
[No] Can I
[Yes] Can you show me 43
Im going outside to make out… care to join me 29
Are you a hooker Cause Im hooked on you. 22
Are you a clock Cause youre ticking me off. 14
If you were a laser you would be set on stunning. 14
Go up to a girl, ask her: “Do you know what winks and screws like a tiger” [No] Then wink. 21
Girl youre like a car accident, causeI just cant look away. 18
Damn girl, you make me feel like a loaf of bread…I wannarise up in your oven! 20
Are you a gardener I have a bush that needs a trim. 24
(stepson some ice) Now that the ice is broken, whats your name 17
Hi, I??™m Mr. Right–I heard you were looking for me. 29
(To someone working somewhere where a counter seperatesyou) Youre like a drug to me. Good thing youre over the counter. 32
Are you a Hurricane [name] Cause youre blowing me away. 16
Girl you so fine I wish I could plant you and grow a whole feildof yall! 27
A tall man to a short woman: “Youre perfect height for what you want.” 28
Im going to need a tall glass of cold water, cuzbaby your making me HOT! 15
Were like Little Ceasars, were Hotand Ready. 34
(She asks you the time) Its two flirty and the dateswith you and me. 21
Excuse me, did you just fart 41
Good evening. May a thorn sit down amongst the roses
Good news, the test results are negative!
Got me Ill do your body good.
Grab them in the butt and ask, “Pardon me, is this seat taken”
Great choice of clothes, they match the trim in the Jag
Guy: Whats your name Girl: Danielle Guy: Oh… I thought it was Aphrodite.
Ive seen till I gazed into your eyes
He: You look like my third wife. She: Oh, how many time have you been married He: Twice.
Hello, Im a thief, and Im here to steal your heart.
Hello. Are you taking any applications for a boy/girlfriend
Hello. Cupid called. He says to tell you that he needs my heart back.
Hey, come here often You could, with me.
Hey, dont frown – youll never know who might be falling in love with your smile.
Hey, dont I know you Yeah, youre the girl/guy with the beautiful smile.
Hey, havent I seen you before I remember, it was in my dreams!
Hey, how did you do that (What) Look so good
Hey, I lost my phone number … Can I have yours
Hey, Laura! (Big hug). I havent seen you forEVER!! (huge kiss) Wow, youve really changed! (Im not Laura) What Oh my God, you even changed your name!
Hey, somebody farted. Lets get out of here.
Hi, Im a fashion photographer. Would you like to be in my next photo shoot
Hi, Im Batman. Wanna see my batmobile
Hi, Im Mr. Right. Someone said you were looking for me.
Hi, my names Right…Mr. Right.
Hi, the voices in my head told me to come over and talk to you.
Hi. Are you cute
Hi. Can I domesticate you
Hi. I suffer from amnesia. Do I come here often
Hi. My name is {name}. Im running for president in 2012. And I could sure use your vote. Here…write down your number and Ill call you to discuss my platform.
I dont know you, but I think I love you already.
I dropped a tear in the ocean, the day I find it is the day Ill stop loving you.
I envy your lipstick.
I have a cat. She would really like to meet you.
I have had a really bad day and it always makes me feel better to see a pretty girl smile. So, would you smile for me
I have only three months to live.
I must be a snowflake, cuz Ive fallen for you.
I must be in heaven because Im standing next to you!
I must be lost. I thought paradise was further south.
I never thought that heaven would be so close to me”
I play the field, and it looks like I just hit a home run with you.
I saw you, I had an asthma attack because you took my breath away!
I think I feel like Richard Gere – Im standing next to you, the Pretty Woman.
I think I must be dying because Im looking at Heaven.
I think my medication is wearing off.
I think youve got something in your eye. Oh never mind, its just a sparkle.
I tried to find the perfect line to make you mine, sweetheart, but after searching all I could come up with was this look in my eyes and your hand in mine, and the words, will you be mine
If a star fell for every time i thought of you, the sky would be empty.
If beauty were a grain of sand, youd be a million beaches.
If beauty were sunlight, youd shine from a million light-years away.
If beauty were time, youd be an eternity.
If God made anything more pretty, Im sure hed keep it for himself.
If I could be anything Id be a tear: Born in your eye, live on your cheek, and die at your lips.
If water were beauty youd be the ocean.
If you know a persons name: “Hi, [name].” How did you know my name “Isnt every beautiful girl named that”
If you were a booger Id pick you first.
If you were a chicken, youd be impeccable.
If you were a laser, youd be set on “stunning”.
If you were a library book, I would check you out.
If you were a new hamburger at McDonalds, you would be McGorgeous.
If you were a tear in my eye I would not cry for fear of losing you.
If you were ice cream and I were hot chocolate Id pour all my love onto you.
Im addicted to yes, and Im allergic to no. So whats it gonna be
Im feeling kind of insecure right now. Could I have a hug
Im invisible. (Really) Can you see me (Yes) How about tomorrow night
Im looking for a friend…do you want to be my friend
Is that baby oil on your forehead Cause you shine like an angel.
Is there a rainbow today I just found the treasure Ive been searching for!
Is there an airport nearby or is that my heart taking off
Is your daddy a thief [“No.”] Then how did he steal the sparkle of the stars and put it in your eyes [Be ready with a snappy answer in case they say “yes.”]
Is your name Gillette Because youre the best a man can get
It must be a day off in heaven for an angel like you to be amongst us.
It must be dark outside. Cause all the sunshine in the world is right here.
Its always good for you to see me again.
Its my birthday! How about a birthday kiss [Is it really your birthday]No, but how about a kiss anyway
Its not my fault I fell in love. You are the one that tripped me.
Ive been noticing you not noticing me.
Ive gotta thirst, baby, and you smell like my Gatorade.
[Look at his/her shirt label. When they say, “What are you doing”, say “Checking to see if you were made in heaven.”
Man, you sure are bright girl! Were you raised by the stars
Man: “Would you like to dance” Woman:(looks at you up and down) “No thank you.” Man: “Sorry, you mustve misunderstood me. I said: “you look fat in those pants!”
Man: excuse me did you just feel my ass Girl: no you: why not
Man:”Girl, you are so rude!” Girl:”How am I being rude” Man:”Because youre looking so fine and not telling me youre name.”
Many people will walk in and out of your life. But only lovers will leave a footprint on your heart. And you my dear have left one great leap on mine!
May I have the distinguished honor and privilege of sitting next to you
My name isnt Elmo, but you can tickle me anytime you want to.
My psychiatrist sent me for an MRI because she thinks I have a magnetic personality.
Nice to meet you, Im (your name) and you are…gorgeous!
Oh my god, I thought I was gay… then I met you.
Oh no, Im choking! I need mouth to mouth, quick!
Ok, Im here, what do you want for your next wish
Oooh, youre lookin fine. Not in the good way, in the “youll do” way.
Please dont go or else I will have to make a report to the cops….u stole my heart
Pull my finger.
Really like your peaches and I wanna shake your tree.
Say, didnt we go to different schools together
Shall we talk or continue flirting from a distance
Smile if you want me!.
So, are you going to give me your phone number, or am I going to have to stalk you
Thats a nice watch [Thank you] Actually, thats a nice dress. [Again, thank you] Come to think of it, everything is nice on you.
The only thing your eyes havent told me about you is your name.
There arent enough “O”s in the word “smooth” to describe how smooth you are.
Turn to the girl sitting next to you at the bar and say, “Im not really this tall….Im sitting on my wallet.”
(Walk over to her)”Ok, you can stand next to me, as long as you dont talk about it.”
Walk up and say, “Yes” “What” “Oh, my friend told me that you wanted to make out with me because Im the inest thing you have seen all night.”
Walk up to a guy/girl hold up a $100 (or more if youre desperate) dollar bill and rip it in half in front of his/her face write your phone number on half of it and hand it to them. Then say, “how about you call me tomorrow and well figure out a way to spend this money”
Was you Father an Alien Cos honey on planet earth theres nothing else like you!
Was your dad king for a day He must have been to make a princess(or prince) like you.
Well, here I am. What were your other two wishes
What does it feel like to be the most beautiful girl in this room
What is your favorite color (Answer) Mine too!
What is your first name Hmm, that goes kinda well with my last name. (switch if female asking a male)
What sort of person are you looking Wait- dont tell me: medium height, blue eyes, etc…
What time do you have to be back in heaven
What would you do if I kissed you right now
Whats a nice girl like you doing in a place like this
Whats a nice girl like you doing talking to a loser like me
Whats that on your face Oh, must just be beauty. Here, let me get it off. Hey, its not coming off!
Whats the name of your perfume “Catch of the Day”
Whats your sign
When God made you, he was showing off.
When I look into your eyes, it is like a gateway into the world of which I want to be a part.
When I marry I wonder if God will be mad that I stole one of his angels.
When I saw you from across the room, I passed out cold and hit my head on the floor…so Im going to need your name and number for insurance reasons.
When you look into the mirror holding up a dozen roses, you see the 13 most beautiful things in the world
Whens our wedding date
(While looking at stars) Baby, I didnt see any stars in the sky tonight, the most heavenly body was sitting right next to me.
Whos your daddy
Why do you have to be so damn fine every single day Cant you take a break and let me concentrate on something else for a change
Woman, I hate to see you go, but I LOVE watching you leave….
Would buy you a drink but I would be jealous of the glass.
You are a 9.9999. Youd be a perfect 10 if you were with me.
You are a beautiful girl, you have probably heard all the great pick up lines, so why dont you just tell me the ones that worked so we can get past all that….”
You are like a candy bar: half sweet and half nuts.
You are not a woman, you are an essence
You are so beautiful that I would marry your brother just to get into your family.
You are so beautiful that you give the sun a reason to shine.
You are so sweet…Im getting a toothache just looking at you…
You are the hottest thing since sunburn.
You know the more I drink, the prettier you get!
You know what Your eyes are the same color as my Porsche.
You know, you might be asked to leave soon. Youre making the other women look really bad.
You look beautiful today, just like every other day.
You look just like my mother.
You look like a big glass of water and I sure am thirsty!
You look like the type of girl who has heard every line in the book … So whats one more
You look so good, I could put you on a plate and sop you up with a biscuit!
You make me melt like hot fudge on a sundae.
You might not be the best looking girl here, but beauty is only a light switch away.
You must be going to hell cause it must be a sin to look that good.
You MUST have a nice personality.
You remind me of a magnet, because you sure are attracting me over here!
You remind me of a pop tart. (Why) Youre cool cause youre hot!
You Say: Looks like were late.” She Says: “For what” You Say: “For dinner.
Your choice this time, Im buying.”
You see my friend over there [Point to friend who sheepishly waves from afar] He wants to know if YOU think IM cute.
Your dad must have been retarded, cuz you are special.
Your daddy must be a terrorist, because baby- you da bomb!
Your earrings are the mirrors which reflect the moonlight into your eyes
Your eyes are as blue as my toilet water at home.
Your eyes have touched my soul
Youre hotter than a Bunsen burner set to full power!
Youre like a dictionary – you add meaning to my life!
Youre so hot you would make the devil sweat.
Youre ugly but you intrigue me.
Youve been a bad girl/boy. Go to my room.
Youve got to refer me to your plastic surgeon.

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